19th feb

So 19th feb
We got up. Got ready to meet each other...supposed to be the parting day... It was 7 am when we met...we started roaming in the campus...then we had breakfast...I felt so good having breakfast with you, you in front of me and I was shying blushing as you looked at me :)
 After breakfast we again started walking..sharing our pasts our families...I cant remember what all I talked about.. I remember your buaji, how much you loved her,,,I could see it in your eyes... Then we sat at the back side of your hostel ...and we talked and talked...then it was time I had to leave...your friends and you and I went to have tea at the thadi... while having tea..your friends again started saying that I should stay...again you didn't speak anything..Vikky gave a terrific idea.. I was all set to execute it.. you dropped me and I went home..planned out and it worked..you waited for around 2-3 hours :)

You never complain about aything... I took a bus and came to the point you asked me to come..I was so happy to see you..you carried my heavy bag...I saw the temple..asked you to take me there...you didn't question you didn't argue..you were like lets go...I was deeply touched..this incident is very close to my heart... Then we prayed together,,, prayers are yet to be answered but I already have more than what I ever wished for :)

We came and sat in your college bus...I was very excited to spend yet another day with you...I was peppy... I teased you ...called you by your cute nick names...and you were just sitting there too happy to even tease me back :P

Its was a long way back...around an hour...you started feeling sleepy...you kept your head on my shoulder and you were asleep...I was so happy to see you sleep next to me...the calmness...ohh its heavenly... There's no moment or happiness comparable to this...when your loved one is sleeping in your arms..you feel like a world to him...and he feels like everthing that concerns is you..

We were about to reach ,,,I had to wake you up... You looked so relaxed... We entered the campus and we were ready for fun...It was around 7.30pm...I would cut short some of the things ;)
 You left me with vikky and we talked about "how you happened to me"...Then again drinks were arranged... We had dinner and then drinking started...

We went too see the band's performance ..there was a brief introduction to an NGO..A women in her 30s was narrating her story...how she became mother to more than 70 homeless children...I was deeply touched by it.. I am pretty weak at heart ..and so hearing such things tears started rolling out..you were standing beside me and wiping my tears :')

Then after that the band started performing..you were standing behind me and I was lying in your arms..what a feeling it was...music all around and you in the arms of your lover... :))))
For two complete hours you held me like that..that feeling of extreme love and care was all there..singing dancing kissing ..

After the band..there was DJ.... And while writing I just recalled that I wasn't drunk till this time..It was your effect..we started drinking after the DJ started... I was swinging a bit..you were all set :P
You wanted to dance rock and roll with me..but I being a pathetic dancer couldn't follow you :P
Then your friend who was also drunk lifted me up and gave me in your arms...I was so scared that you'll drop me..but no..I was wrong ..You very safely landed me on ground...We danced for a while and then we came and sat in the ground..my head was swinging ..still I told you I want to get more high..you made me eat chocolates ..hehe...we talked a bit and you with so much of love gave me chocolates to eat...We kissed ate and talked...That was the most beautiful night ever...

It was around 4 am when we went back to our respective rooms...
We messaged talked and slept :))

the love EPIC

!8th  !9th and 2:O th  feb
hmmm...let me begin
I somehow managed to get permission to attend your college fest for a day. I said I'll come back on 19th  morning.
You came to receive me with nancy.
I was waiting for you in the mall.
Standing at the enterance , I saw you coming... you were wearing a light pink and white stripped shirt.. :)
As usual I liked you and your shirt..you have a terrific dressing sense.
Then we went to Subway and you went to buy nancy a sandwich,, I was looking at you,,talking to nancy but all I was thinking was you...thinking u are so caring :)
Then you came and sat near me and I shifted to next chair and when you were about to sit. I realised the chair i was sitting on was broken :P
And you teased me .
I was conscious at that time cos I was meeting your friend for the first time...i was cautious of what impression I'll have on her( ...stupid thoughts of mine ;) )
And then we were walking out of mall and I shifted a little far from you and I teased you saying that I don't know you if my mum saw me with you :P

Next we were in the auto nancy me and you in that order...the feeling of you near me :)))))))))))))
The auto started moving and my hair started flying all over your face :P
A little bit chit chat in the auto.

Then we reached your college..we went to the canteen to eat that sandwich... You ordered tea for all...((no no i didn't have it...you tried to share with me and I said I dont share tea ;) thinking that it will remind you of agneepath where we shared coke..and those weird thoughts of me thinking our love will grow if we shared the coke ;) ..but you stupid thing! you thought I was putting forward some religious dogma of mine :P ))
You made me eat that sandwich although I wasn't willing to eat as I had had my lunch a little while ago..

After eating nancy went and we started walking in the campus...then we went to the spot where you had made those sand art things yesterday with nancy...you explained each of the sand art to me.. you are so damn cute :)
then you said lets go to some place I followed you and asked you should I open my hair...You were like yes yes!!
Then you wanted to take a pic of me.. such things make me feel I am so beautiful ;) hehe...
Anyway
our next spot was an empty ground..which came after crossing the construction site...You told me to be careful...then we crossed a  thorny hedge and you stood in front of it and made me pass through it so that I don't get hurt :))))

Then we sat in the shade of a tree..how romantic ..hehe...
In a while you said you want to keep your head in my lap and sleep... you were lying on my lap and my heart was overflowing with love for you...all I could do was look at you and caress your hair. You didn't care about the grass which got all stuck up to your jeans and shirt...all you wanted was to lie there..I was filled with so much of motherly love..same kind of love which I often feel for you..you being my little son and I being a proud mother :)

Then we sat cuddling kissing each other....then you made me sit in your lap...although I am 54 kgs but you make me feel as if am just light like a feather :) I remember the way you pulled me on your lap :)
My arms around you ...so so so so so so so so so so so much love....
Then I felt shy sitting in your lap so i got down.
Then again you clicked my pics.. ..
We ate that stupid chocolate which I had brought..

Can you imagine we were sitting there for more than 4 hours...it just feels like seconds..
Then when we got up we were brushing grass off each others clothes which stuck all over us...

I felt like hugging you...after crossing the hedge we hugged and every time I hug you I feel so relieved...
Then it was around 4.30 pm and I had to leave... You messaged your friends to meet me....and you asked me what I wished to eat...we ordered a pizza ..while we were odering your friends came in and demanded treat ...haha...and you ordered another pizza...

Then I met Vikky, Aulakh,  Seth...you told them I have to leave in some time...they were like ruk ja na yaar ye mauka phir to nahi milega ...last time hai... and I was looking at you and you didn't say anything..you understood my problem(..how sweet you are )...
Then I made up my mind that I ll stay anyhow...nancy lied to mum pa..and lo! I was staying...I called you up saying it didn't work and you knew I was lying...I rushed to meet you..felt like hugging you then and there...

Then you asked me will you drink..I said yes!
Very unlike me, but I wanted to enjoy every moment with you..to hell with my no to drinking phobia..! We had dinner and after that we rahul khusbu and vikky were walking in the streets... We were drinking Bhabhi..( ..lol)..it tasted sour :(

But after we were down half bottle( pepsi mixed with bhabhi) my head was swinging...cold night you walking by my side and I was drunk...nothing can be better :)
I felt like loving you...
while walking we went in the building..so that we can go to the terrace and drink there...but we stuck up on an empty room...it was the gym room...we sat on a machine ..you facing me I facing you...we hugged ...kissed...we drank...soon two bottles were empty...I wanted to love you so much..we were talking kissing and talking...you even recited a sweet poem( I regret having a good memory..but I can bet it was the sweetest poem ever sung that too spontaneously..I was all in awe of the moment)..we talked about your past...you hugged me and cried..aahh..I was so touched...I knew I'll make up for all the bad things happened to you in your past...
 I don't know for how long we were there..
then I felt like lying down and you on top of me...I laid down on the floor..you came over me..you were kissing me...I so much wanted to cross all the limits..


Then twist in the scene came when a guard suddenly came and we instantly got up from the floor and rushed outside..saving our souls ..hehe.. I was swinging ...we went to the ground where dance competition was going on..I don't remember what happened after that...
Just the moment when I was seeing you off in the night,,and I didn't want you to leave me..

Then we were messaging ...you called up and we were talking...don't know for how long..then you told me to sleep...
But I was so filled with love..i couldn't sleep for whole night..I was thinking of you...as the clock stuck 6..I wanted to be there with you...you called me..we started getting ready...as I had to leave around 10am...so we wanted to spend as much time as we could together..

Will continue in next post :)

the missing you phenomenon continues...

Hey Py,
Second day began a little late for me, as it was difficult for me to get from my bed without hearing your sweet voice. Everytime I opened my eyes I would miss you and close them and try to sleep again. You thoughts, your love, your care... I am blessed to have you..
Altough I miss you a lot, but I am happy that I have you, who loves me so much, I am not crying today. And I know you'll never let me cry.
There are so many things I want to do for you and with you...endless things.
Yesterday when you reached rishikesh and started describing the place, "aadhe ghante se mountain se niche aa rahe hai, itna sundar hai na yaha pe...aage sand hai pas me river hai...andhera hai sab jagah bas do laalten hain...hamesha se mann tha ki teko aisi jagah leke aaun, hum sand me baithe ek dusre ko hug karke...but abhi tu nahi hai to is jagah me bhi kamiya nazar aa rahi hai, tu sath hoti to kitna beautiful hota, tu aur mai kahi bhi chale jaye sab beautiful ho jata hai"


Last night you when you were drunk. The things you say after drinking and your messages.. I keep thinking about them and keep reading your messages...there is so much love in them.
The way you said, " I am lying in the cold sand and I can see sky full of stars and I am missing you beside me, miss hugging you". I just wished I was there.
Then again you called me and said, " Pta hai mai chalte chalte gir gaya do baar, aur mujhe kuch samaj  ni aa raha, bas teko phone kar diya, pta nahi subah uthunga tab pata chalega kitni chot ayi hai. tere se bat karne ka mann hua aur maine phone kar liya, kuch aur samaj hi nahi ata."
"sab ko dekh ke sad ho jata hu kabhi kabhi teko miss kar ra hu, tu hoti to yaha pe sab jealous ho jate itna pyaar karta na".

Teri baaten kitni pyaari hoti hai Py, makes me think how lovable you are. How can anybody hurt such a beautiful person like you :(

Will love you always sweetheart :)

without you

Py its 2.35pm abhi... हिंदी में लिखने का मनं हो रहा है . तेरी बहुत याद आ रही है . तुझे एक बात बतानी थी पर हिम्मत ही  नहीं हुई. तू आने के बाद पूछ लेना.
ये बहुत बड़ी वजह है जिस कारण मै नहीं आ पाई .
दुनिया में जितना प्यार मुमकिन है न उतना और उस से भी ज्यादा प्यार करना है मुझे. पता नहीं तेरे से क्यों मिलाया भगवान ने मै तो इतनी अच्छी भी नहीं हू.
बेबी .. हेहे.. कैसा लग रहा है हिंदी में लिख के :)
तू जो है तो सब कुछ है , ना कोई कमी है... तू ही दिल है ..तू जान भी है...
तू ख़ुशी है , आसरा भी है ...

मै अभी ना न्यूज़पेपर  पढ़ रही हू.. एम्प्लोय्मेंट न्यूज़ ...एक दो फॉर्म फिल करुँगी रात में तेरे से बात करके.
आज तो तू खूब पिने वाला है मुझे पता है ;)
मेरी याद में  :प
लोल

my cradle

Am a baby and you are my cradle
You swinging with me
You caring for me
You playing with me
Am a baby and you are my cradle

Each time I start crying
You increase your pace
Slowly I fall asleep
With peace on my face

I play with you whole day
Make you sway all noon
But you never complain
You never frown

After whole day when in the night I am tired
You again open your arms and draw me near
You take away my tiredness
I feel rejuvenated

When I dream lying on you I have the whole world above me
Each dream is within my reach
When the world scares me I turn over
And I have you and only you and I hold you closer to me

Slowly with your swings
You are crooning a lullaby to me
You are saying to me
You'll love me each day like this day

And

I feel like am a baby and you are my cradle
You swinging with me
You caring for me
You playing with me
Am a baby and you are my cradle

TROY

Just now watched TROY. A very good movie but heart wrenching. Courageous warriors more courageous were their women who could bravely see their men being killed, their sons losing their fathers. Brave world out there, I feel the cowardest of all. I could not even bear the thought of losing someone dear to me. I might be exaggerating what I will write now, but I at this moment fear the most is losing you Py, my best friend, my love, my world, the beautiful dream world that I have built around you.

Not even in my dream would I be able to bear this thought. You are way too precious to me to be lost. The love care and affection that you showered on me in these few days have made me more weak. I might be emotionally stronger but I dread on the thought of being away from you even for a moment. I close my eyes I see you I hear your voice, you are with me all the time. Sometimes it feels that I have never been loved, because every moment spent with you is so overwhelmingly full of love, I could have lived happily with that one moment forever, but you know I have so many such moments and so you can imagine my happiness, my fear.

Thank you for making me feel beautiful making me feel that I can be loved. I wouldn't ask anything from you ever but one that let me love you till my last breath. You are my strength. I would not fail your expectations.

I am sorry for the things you have to go through because of me, I never knew it would turn this way.

I just know this that I love you. I adore you. I wish that God would grant me my one last wish, I'll wait for IT as long as I am alive. Its a stupid wish so please don't ask me. I would tell you the day I would be blessed with IT.


Would like to quote one of the movie's dialogue:
"Achilles: I'll tell you a secret. Something they don't teach you in your temple. The Gods envy us. They envy us because we're mortal, because any moment might be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we're doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again." 

29th February 2012

Wow...just now I talked to my loved one and he made this date so special. This date has come 6 times in my past years, never felt its significance till today. Although with him each day is a special one. But this day would come after 4 years. And you know what the next four years would be so full of love and care. I would like to promise you on this day, that wherever in the world I may be I would surely come to spend some time with you on this day specially. With each leap year I can see our friendship growing stronger. There is nothing that can stop our love our concern for each other to stagnate, it can only grow.

I wish to make each day worth remembering for you. So that when you look back you can say, "Ah! Those were some beautiful days."

This rose would stay with me forever and this smile would too :)
The base is yellow signifying our friendship and on which our love has grown in green and red. Probably that white signifies the tears or the emotions that is holding our love intact :)
Love You Forever!